too much on my mind

Have you ever had so much on your mind that you couldn't actually concentrate on any one thing? That's how I've been all semester. So here I am, watching the Lord of the Rings- The Return of the King, yet even this one simple pleasure only adds distracting background noise to the already raucous mishmash in my head.

hopefully, all will be put to rest on Wednesday.

even so, it brings up a valid question, really fitting to me right now. as Christians, our only goal is our Lord Himself and His kingdom. but as humans, we have human responsibilities that we need to take care of. in my case, my one, top responsibility right now is to do well in school and to graduate in a timely manner. so then, what am i to do when it seems that no amount of self-control, or even prayer, is helping me devote adequate time and concentration to my studies? how else can i pray? what more do i pray for? do i just try to be as strict as possible with myself? it just never seems good enough.

I know we just cast our anxieties on the Lord, and that He intercedes on our behalf, and that our enjoyment of the Lord should elicit a proper human living, and etc., but what if it's not working?

i guess, all i can do is try my hardest, humanly, and more importantly, trust in the Lord, spiritually.